False Self vs. True Self

False selves and true selves are two very different selves we have. A false self is the image we portray to the world. Be it by social media or in person, it is not the real us. It’s the us we wish we were or the us that we wish that others would think that we were. It’s the more than perfect version of ourselves. It’s photoshopped with perfect lighting and a filter. It’s always smiling, never addicted to anything, and so squeaky clean your grandma’s gloves would never find a smudge of dirt on it. It’s better than you, even if it walks around pretending to be humble. It’s the do it all you. The you that can run on coffee and a bagel. The you that works and parties and goes on vacations and posts pictures of it all for everyone to like on instagram. It’s the you that is constantly on the look out for the perfect thing to post that is on point with “the look” you’re trying to achieve. It’s the you that can do it by yourself, without help from anyone else, without Jesus. Then there’s that cute lil authentic true self underneath the false self. It’s the you that had braces, acne and hormones in grade school. It’s the you that is scared sometimes, ok all of the time. It’s the you that is utterly dependent upon Jesus because you don’t know how to survive with out Him. True you is the real you, the you that has warts, athlete’s foot, cavities. True you has baggage that needs sorting, or baggage that has been sorted and turned over to the Lord for redemption. Learning how to dislodge false you and learn how to be comfortable being true you all the time no matter what you’re doing, who you’re with, what you’re posting, what you do for a living, and who is watching. Taking of the sticky layers of false you filters and allowing the transparency of your beautiful unique and special you to be the face people see, that’s the goal of therapy. Processing the pain that happened way back then until only recently so that the true you can feel confident being vulnerable and taking risks. Which you is the you that you are showing to people? It’s exhausting pretending to be someone you’re not. Pretending to be perfect, to have it all together. Let’s work on you being real together. Therapy is a great place to practice shifting false you to the side and allowing someone to see the cracks. In ancient asian cultures, when a jar was cracked they would seal it with gold. The most beautiful jars were the broken ones. I’ve also heard it put another way, that the cracks are where the light gets through. You + me + Jesus + some EMDR, let’s do this and be two true selves sitting with the Truth, telling the truth.

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